Meer dan vrienden (2020)

☂ Drunk Dialing 4 Dummies ⛈ Dysfunction Under Inspection ☂ °7.8° °Excellent°

Spoilers are clearly marked and at the bottom.

Witches brew: These 3 friends are cursed!

Wu-Yeon(Wu) the 'ex-collector', says she's cursed to be forever trapped in a 1sided ♥️ w/ Su, despite days, mos, years~> Despite the /decade/ that's elapsed. She seems composed, but when alcohol pours in, emotions pour out into Su's vm. Wu has a most-of-life crush on Su, who has declared them to be in friendzone⛔️… more than twice, or thrice (or double on ice) for a full decade. Su drops into town & mixes her up, only to exit without leaving a gratuity. That forever leaves Wu forlorn & in need of liquid relief, which leads to slurpee vms on Su's phone. She's a serial drunk-dialer, & her friends are so hungover it. Su might be their friend, but he drags the party down.

Yeong-Hui(Hu) grew up poor, w/ no advantages behind, & only struggles ahead. She's been cursed to a life of toil, poverty, & unworthiness. Hu is 1/2 of the couple mixed within the group. She and her BF struggle to face life's hardships and muddled family pressures, while trying to stay strong together. The only true struggle is that Hu refuses to accept that the man she loves can truly accept her: She's too poor and her family is always in trouble: She will only drag him down, she'scertain.

Jin-Ju(Ju) is cursed as well: Never to know ♥️. Ju struggles with loneliness. Her life, without love, is a drag.

MTF pulls up a chair alongside a band of boozers & toast the twenties. Wu, Hu & Ju were fused 🔗by combat in the HS arena. Now it's 10 years post graduation, when everybody thinks they have it figured out, but virtually no one does. They're learning to navigate adult jobs, situations and relationships. The 3 girls have a lifetime bond from their early HS years, so when Yeong-Hui pairs up with her BF, his friends come along as chasers to round out a 6-pack: 1 couple + 4 drinking buddies.

This brings us to now. Su is back in town, and once again sends signals to Wu that appear encouraging (is it finally happy hour?), only to flip the table on her once more. Again. As soon as Wu moves on to someone else, Su suddenly declares feelings for.... Guess who.

Their stories dial-in to several themes, including:

☂ Scars from thoughtlessness

☂ Pain's effects on emotional health, incl toxic Parent-child relationships & self-inflicted wounds

☂ Surviving 1sided♥️ - They all go through it

☂ Faulty suppositions - recheck yours every 5 years or so. They can't all be right.

☂ The sinking loneliness of selfishness vs the buoyancy of generous & committed ♥️

MTF also offers paths to resolution: L♥️ve is opening, giving & accepting. Maturity is learning to be unselfish, even when it hurts. Especially then.

For a few episodes, it was difficult to tell if it was worth the wait for last call. There were a generous pours of quality exchanges, metaphors, quotes, ironies, basically the usual for the better Kdramas - The ones they do well are outstanding, if not superbly divine. 75% into the show, I had only been looking at it through narrowed eyes in low light, waiting for the moment a glass would shatter and MTF would be easily swept away & forgotten. However, by ep15, I felt like a regular with the gang at the pour-it-all-out-house. Unexpectedly, real tears started flowing. Inner conflict overflowed next over the proper rating: 7? Am I looking at this thru the bottom of the glass? An absolutely stunning conversation put the answer into focus - MTF has buoyancy. It is refreshing, and it dazzles when it catches the light.

There's a spill of latent (submerged) emotions in MTF's examination of the 3 women and the challenges they stare down from across the table in their quest for: Love, financial independence, and the most elusive honesty-to-self. MTF opens their circle and invites the viewer in. Like with any relationship, the show leaves room to allow the viewers to drop in and raise a glass, even though we must hold back the urge to smash a soju bottle over some noggins.

This is more of a drama than a romance, and it is a worthy one. The cast is smooth and fluid; not a sour in the bunch. Ong Seong-Wu exhibits a truly great performance as Su. Be prepared for the slower cadence with anything that helps bring relaxation, and watch them blend, stir, and shake their lives.

〰QUOTES〰

Words are like boomerangs. The come back at you. (Aigoo. HEAR, youngins!)

Emotions are determined by the person on the receiving end. (Isn't perspective & timing everything?)

I'm afraid you will use the wounds you received as a shield & grow up a warped adult.

Back views are the saddest


〰IMHO〰

🎬7.5 🎭7.5 🖋〰 8 (This is the writer's 1st credited work, so we've been promised future brilliance) 💓7 🦋5 🤔8 🌞5 🎨7 🔚8

Age 15+



⚠️SPOILER SECTION⚠️

Before the next round, let's sweep away the broken bottles: MTF deliberately matures at a slow, near frustrating pace. It's relaxing if you can - Just un-tense↪ now breathe〰 What will likely frustrate every viewer is that Su, Wu, & Hu are as irritating as a botched drink order. Perhaps it's not what you're expecting, but the director & writer have placed tasty fusion on the table.

In defense of the house specials, 1st we'll look at:

Su. Most people dislike him. For most of MTF he's emotionless. He's cold & self-isolated. Su was alone his entire childhood. Now he's alone, even amongst friends. From his view, human interaction means bitterly spatting parents. Affection denied is intimacy died. ‘Relationships are distasteful’, is what he learned at home. No wonder he's a photographer. He studies but never participates. At the same time, he desperately tries to let ☀ inside. Obnoxious, cold, or odd behaviors are childhood painkillers. Kids cope in any way they can. Entrenched behaviors turn into bad habits that are difficult to delete, like a voicemail once it's already been delivered. "Kron-ih-'kah," while it's appropriate (helpful, even) to call out bad behavior, we shouldn't tell a person that s/he isn't handling pain "right". Be patient & generous w/ others.

Though Su won't imbibe his own feelings, it's obvious that he's always been intoxicated with Wu~

⏱ Per his overseas friend, when Su's in the USA, his comment card mentions Wu ·only· by name. No one else from Kcountry

⏱ Su picked on, cheered up &/or defended no girls, other than than Wu

⏱ No doubts, he enjoys spending ⏱ w/ Wu

⏱ He enjoys it so much that he fills her ☕️ & ⏱ whenever he's back, despite her deflections. "I want to see Wu as much as I can before I leave," he says, etc

⏱ His narcissistic jokes are on the tab, but he never leaves tips about the the good things he's done for Wu

Su's a world away from understanding how his actions leave Wu as frozen as a daiquiri. He lied to himself 1st, being blinded by fear & blunting to his underexposed emotions. Feelings for Wu gush out after she leaves the table to sit in the corner w/ another guy. Then (THEN!) he declares himself. Its effect is 100% contrary to his hopes.

{Bunny⚫> IRL, ya'll RUN AWAY! A romantic relationship won't, nor is it supposed to, fix such problems. People like this often don't want to be part of a project that will hire them. The very moment their desired 'object' stirs, they'll dump ice water all over. MTF is fiction. Don't mix up your life that way}

Enough w/ the ♥️🔺s! Not realizing, as a newbie, what a departure MTF is from Kdrama tropes (the CEO is not the best match), the kind CEO seems the better choice. Su is a different person by the end. He exits w/ his glass ½ full. He loves. He's open to friendship. He is now able to point the lens Wu's way: It's HE that's been in a 1-sided♥️ w/ HER, he declares. I was stunned, and so was Wu. She stops, reviews, & realizes ALL her relationships had been 1sided~> b/c of HER. That's top-shelf writing. It was this scene + crying real tears that took my rating from 7 to 8.

Wu: Though shy, she seems adjusted in HS, but her life's blood is leaking. Sensing she's helpless, sharks attack. Even w/ her friends' support, her emotions are still stunted. HS is when she begins to take Su's cues as clues of his interest. Sadly, Su ain't got a clue ·yet· Wu musters the courage to offer her 💝 to Su at the airport as he's escaping M&D by going to the USA. He visibly stiffens to rebuff her w/ blank eyes & rigid face, as a resolute chill falls like a dropped napkin. It's the 1st in a decade of misalignments between them. She cries for a long ⏱. Eventually, she just cries when she's sozzled. This ♻ repeats in bursts. Su reappears & appears interested, so Wu is frozen in hope. Her loved ones are hungover from it all. They don't like Su.

Wu is her most frustrating when she breaks up w/ Su. She's wrong. She agrees to go abroad w/ him, goes back on her promise, & then blames him for not being there - he doesn't ♥️ her enough, she blames. She wasn't honest about ·what· she needed from ·whom· preferring a draught of resentment when her needs sat empty. Just as she always flits from ex-to-the-next, never once opening up, then floating away, she pivots and does the same to Su.

1-sided♥️ is a symptom, as is her projec/deflec·tion. Neither she nor Su is able to heal the other. They must self-heal to self-liberate or they'll self-isolate & self-medicate.

Hu is suffering from what's referenced in The Perks Of Being A Wallflower: "We accept the 💘 we think we deserve." Always railing against poverty, her mother's complaints drip continuously until their tiny apt was overflowing. Mom's resentment became a bitterness that long ago blotted out affection. Hu has been plied with inferiority. She was dunked into the whirlpool w/ no way to emerge, so she truly believes she's dragging down Hun-Jae, her BF since HS. After all, he shouldn't suffer the way she has! Once again, as is the case w/ Su, the branding from childhood cannot be brushed away. She's also extremely stubborn, like mom, so it takes her a long ⏱ to come around.

It's frustrating how nobody has a faster epiphany, but isn't that true life? People don't pivot like Michael Jordan. These characters, blinded by pain, aren't contrived. I'm reminded of Kafka's Metamorphosis & how fed up I was w/ Gregor: "Someone should smash this bug!" Lol〰 Kafka's manipulations: He tricks the reader into being just as fed up as Gregor's family. Gregor didn't do anything wrong↪ Except↪he frustrated us↪so "bring out the Raid!"

The series is to the rim w/ metaphors:

☂ Absent Su, the dummies are drinking. Wu keeps looking at the empty Su-less chair next to her

☂ Jurassic Park's "Objects in mirror are closer than they appear" is cleverly placed (Su's apt in rearview)

☂ Wu & Su's clothes will start matching as they see each other more often

☂ Pinocchio's nose teaches us that lying distances us from others. We always lie to ourselves 1st. What sensible profundity

〰☂〰 ⛈Rain⛈ 〰☂〰

In MTF, rain represents the rough stuff of life that hammers all. Similar to armor, the ☂☂s are protective Shields. When Su decides to ♥️ Wu, he abandons his ☂ (He ✨ when wet. Ahem). Unprotected, Su hazards the elements & gets drenched. (Song-Wu Ong should do more scenes in the rain, all wet ☺).

People don't share ☂s often in the show. They're all alone in trying to protect themselves from the ⛈ of life. Instead of a lightweight ☂, they're wrapped up & weighted down in armor. We stand strong, walk shielded, & party-on better TOGETHER. It's not a coincidence that Hu compares turtle shells to armor over scars. Eventually, one will die from the weight or learn to take some off. (Of all the hypocrisy! - As if she's going to walk in the rain & not get wet! She will finally pull her chair all the way up to the table.)

About hypocrisy... When Ju tells the other girls how she sees ♥️, fate, & commitment, she might have been staggering around the room from the looks Hu&Wu shot her. The viewer's expectation is that the 2 will choose a personal-life application from the menu. Instead, they comment on how /Ju/ has matured! We're all blind to our own stuff. That scene drops a case of stuff.

Along w/the ♥️🔺, MTF serves up another trope: MSS (Mandatory-Separation-Syndrome). Usually painful as cirrhosis, for Su & Wu it's a good thing. The power balance between them should be 1:1 parts, which is necessary for them to grow together. It's also appropriate that Su's devotion be proof-tested.

The men in this show are saint-level good: Loving, patient, supportive... These girls tapped-the-majic-keg! Even though Wu didn't choose Saint CEO, she did catalyze Su into becoming her prince. Ding-dong! The curse is lifted. Each girl gets her prince! Ju, the girl w/ the loveless curse, gets married 1st. (It looks that way - they'll make it. Right? ;)) She had been looking & lamenting that she would never find him, but he had always been spilled out in front of her. The other two come to realize they weren't cursed in the first place. None of them were.

Lees verder