2024

I can't help but wish for it... to spend more time with this man.

I like you. Whether you’re a man or an alien, I don’t care any more.

Among countless words floating in our heads, we carefully pick the easiest and simplest ones and talk to each other. But we know that our feelings are not simple as the words we exchange.

To wish for life when you love them and death when you hate them. Wishing them to live while wishing them to die. Such paradox of fickleness. That is what it means to be captivated.

Companies started by friends always fail. I've seen it happen countless times in my life. Never. We will never have a fall-out. How can you be so sure? Our friendship power is crazy high.

I don't want to be someone who offers you an umbrella when you're stood in the rain. I'd rather be someone who stands in the rain with you.

Do you know the eightfold fence? From the time we are small, it is something we are taught to build within ourselves. An impenetrable wall, behind which we can retreat whenever we need. You must train yourself to listen without hearing. 

Time spent together rarely guarantees a bond of trust.

 I think you and I are destined to suspect each other.

You know there are lots of holes on the moon's surface, right? Maybe they are shelters for aliens to hide from danger.

I can even travel halfway around the world for you. No. Even if you were to end up in a different time, I would jump over time and space to see you.

Did I perhaps lose my memories... or you?

I didn't want it to stop. On the day you first came to me I didn't want you to be the rain that soaks me wet only momentarily. I've prayed so hard. Do you know how I feel? I've dreamt of you every day.

Memories don't disappear. All of the memories that you see, hear and fell all throughout your life seeps through your soul. So, even if the head forgets, the sould does not.

Zhuang Jie, I’ve thought it through. Confidants, lovers, or sweethearts — anything is fine by me. As long as we can be together, I can be with you forever. Because of you, I can do it. 

Since I was young people said I was smart, so I thought I was. But I'm stupid. I finally realized that. Once I did... I was able to give up everything. Even you. But then, I thought...  I never once had you. So, I thought I should say this... I love you.

It has always been like that. I always do everything I set my mind to.

In kazakh culture, friendship or love between humans blooms from being seen... so “I like you” in kazakh is “men seni zhaksy koremin” which means “I see you clearly”.

These past three months, what did you experienced at the summer ranch? I experienced life. I loved, I lived, I got hurt, and I hurt others too.

Look at the trees and grass on the grassland. They are called useful if people eat and use them. But if no one uses them, it's perfectly fine for them to simply exist in the grassland. They are free, aren't they?

If we get to meet again... 

There's still so much I want to say... 

I wanted to visit so many places, but i never got to in my lifetime, so... 

I wanted to see you again, even in a dream, but it never happened.

I've been looking for you for so long. I'm sorry I didn't recognize you when I told you I'd find you. How did I not know it was you? You're the person I can rely on just like I did in the past. I've missed you, Hyunwoo oppa.

Do you remember how you carried me out of that hospital?
Yes.
I think that's when it began. Afterwards, I kept thinking about you. You're curt. You deliberately say hurtful things, and you easily go off on people. You're bad at expressing your feelings and even worse at following your heart. You don't know what women's expectations are. But I still like you.

I would be happy if I could also try things with you, one by one.

My love never changed... my heart would drop the moment I see him.