Controversial, But Hear Me Out

Well don’t know where to start with this one, but I will say this BL is a little controversial since it can be viewed in different ways depending on the person. I have a very “in the middle” opinion with this show so I will state what I think like if I’m writing an informative essay… kinda lol.

Some may state that this BL is considered incest while others will state otherwise. But as of now let’s focus on the first opinion.

Is this incest?

Well considering they’re not blood related, no it’s not incest but other factors play a major part into why this could be seen as incest. Other people have mentioned how the fact that since Qian raised Yuan since a very young age that he should not have those sorts of feelings towards Yuan. I read a review saying that it’s understandable that Yuan had those feelings considering his rough past and also him being young and taken care of by Qian could possibly confuse him and make him have feelings for Qian. But Qian reciprocating those feelings is just plainly wrong because for one he’s old enough to understand what’s right and wrong. And two he basically saw Yuan grow so you would guess they would only have a family relationship and feelings towards eachother. Now, this is something that I am confused about, though liking an adopted or non-blood-related person is very possible mostly if they’re adopted already while you’re in your teens or so. But if you’re growing up with them since little I would assume you would only see them as a family member. Like this is what I would see it as but if my family adopted someone when I was very young and I grew up with them I would never have such romantic feelings towards them since once again, I grew up with them and will only see them as a sibling. I’ve also never understood how in some shows best friends that grew up together also start having feelings with eachother because to me if we grow up together I will see you more as a family rather than a friend that could possibly turn into something romantic. You know? Now having a best friend that you grew up with since very young and having an adopted person that you grew up with are very different things because, one is adopted lol so that automatically makes you related to them. But it’s still something that seems to play a similar role to me because once again, if we grow up together, you’re family to me and I will see you as such. It’s not the same as meeting someone who was adopted by your family when you’re, let’s say 15 and they’re 15 too, and by the time you’re a bit older you realize you have feelings for that person because once again you met that person at a pretty mature age and didn’t technically grow up together.

Anyway, that’s all I have to say about that opinion. I side with both opinions being stated for this show. Because once again it’s controversial. But let’s talk about the second opinion and come to a conclusion.

Is it not incest?

Morally speaking it is, realistically speaking from DNA and so on. No, it’s not. No matter what anyone thinks they’re not blood related. So is it not incest? Before I keep going let’s search up what incest is. And from a quick search it states “ Incest is human sexual activity between family members or close relatives. This typically includes sexual activity between people in consanguinity, and sometimes those related by affinity, adoption, or lineage”. Therefore based on this definition what they did is incest since he’s adopted by Qian. But once again they’re not blood related. Since I can remember the word incest has mainly been used when actual blood related members of a family have a romantic relationship between themselves. Though when someone dates their stepbrother or stepsister it’s a little bit more normalized but by some it’s also considered incest. There’s a lot of shows/movies about stepsiblings catching feelings for eachother, but back to the age thing most of the times this is portrayed, the stepsiblings meet when they’re in their late teens and don’t necessarily grow up together. So it’s not as controversial. Cause it’s like a friend of yours or your crush suddenly becoming your stepsibling cause your parent and their parent decided to be together.

Ok that’s all I can think of to say for both sides, ngl trying to write out about this not being incest was a little hard because the way this BL is portrayed is very much incest coded.

But to conclude, this BL is gonna be seen differently by many different people depending on their own personal views and opinions. I myself will admit that I’m in the middle about this show, although I do see why it’s seen as incest I can also accept why it’s not. Yes, it’s more to the incest side because of different factors such as age gap, the fact Yuan was adopted by Qian, the fact that he was very young when he was adopted by Qian, and the fact that Qian played a father, mother and older brother role for both Lili and Yuan throughout the years, and not only until Yuan confessed his feelings did Qian suddenly start having those feelings for him as well which leads me to think that before Yuan showed signs of liking Qian and also confessed, Qian had no such feelings for Yuan. And that thought makes it a bit weird but also not? Once again, controversial as fuck. Very complex to actually put a label on it as either incest or not incest. At the end of the day, they were both kids when they met eachother, there was an age gap but possibly no bigger than 7 years, but still they were kids when they met. They both had hard lives and tough pasts. A lot of trauma and no therapy or anything that could’ve emotionally helped them. Even Qian would have nightmares about his mother, therefore he isn’t mentally stable to make more mature reasonable decisions such as not dating your adopted brother. Both need therapy and need help mentally, and the fact that they liked eachother isn’t 100% their fault, most likely not their fault at all. For one you can’t control your feelings, and second they’re both not mentally stable to possibly understand how weird it actually is. And the fact that everyone else accepted it so easy didn’t help this case either. Because in reality this probably wouldn’t have been so easily accepted by people mostly coming from a gay relationship. But that’s just how this show turned out to be and we must accept it as it is. Overall I will admit it was a good show, the acting was good, the story was decent, and everything else was good too. It’s just a little controversial but that shouldn’t be something you let ruin your watching experience, mostly when you consider the other factors as to why things turned out the way they were. Was it a little unrealistic in some parts? Yes. But this whole show is a little unrealistic and controversial all over. But also realistic and relatable in certain parts.

Final thoughts

Have an open mind when you watch this show, your opinion is valid whether you think this is incest or not, or both. It’s up to you to let this show be a certain experience for you wether that be a bad, good or both. But let’s not lie, the chemistry was good, and so was the acting, casting, and directing.

Overall: 8.8/10

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