Love in the Big City (2024)

Absence of Acceptance 대도시의 사랑법

From the very first scene, you know this show isn't here to play it safe. It hits hard and it tackles the kind of deep topics a lot of people avoid. Go Yeong's story feels painfully real, he is drowning under the expectations of his family, dealing with the constant judgment from society and on top of that struggling with the kind of love that consumes you but might never be enough. And there is also his mom's denial of his sexuality which isn't just a personal issue it's also showing what so many families go through. They love their kids but can't reconcile that love with the traditions they have been brought up to believe. The show doesn't sugarcoat this and it's not here to hand out easy answers. It is messy and uncomfortable, the way it is when you are queer in a world where acceptance is still trying to catch up.

And unlike with other shows, Go Yeong's growth isn't that epiphany that comes out of the blue and then suddenly everything just falls in place. It is slow and it is frustrating at times. The pressure of fitting into the mold wanted by society and family does not just disappear and the show keeps the tension alive. It's his story but at the same time it says something many people are feeling right now....the struggle of trying to figure out where you fit when the world is constantly shifting and when who you are is in direct conflict with who everyone expects you to be. And the beauty of it all is in the balance which is great because the show manages to be introspective and deep without tipping into melodrama and there are still these little moments of humor that remind you that even in the darkest times there is still room for joy.

Mi Ae is another key piece of this puzzle. She is proof of how important chosen family is especially in LGBTQ+ narratives. In a country like Korea where traditional family values are so embedded in the culture, acceptance doesn't always come from your biological family. Mi Ae and Go Yeong's relationship is showing that the people who really have your back aren't always the ones you share DNA with, they are the ones who choose to walk alongside you through the mess and the beauty of it all.

I think this show is a gutpunch in the best way possible. Messy love, identity and family are all told so delicately. I also really like how real these characters are: the struggles are real and it doesn't shy away from hard truths with respect to what being queer entails. Heartbreaking at times, hopeful at others and yet another reminder that love in all forms leaves its mark on you, even when the happy ending isn't there. I am STILL not over it!

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Three men, one love.

Kim Nam-gyu : He represents the kind of love that Go Yeong wasn not prepared to face, it was intense, genuine and emotionally demanding. He is everything Go Yeong might have needed but wasn’t ready to reciprocate. Nam-gyu is the "what if" love, the one who could have been a transformative presence in Go Yeong’s life but circumstances, timing and Go Yeong's own hesitations held them back from ever fully realizing that potential. He is the person who stood on the edge of becoming something more, someone who could have brought stability but it never quite happened.

Youngso: He is the love that Go Yeong was finally ready for but the other one wasn’t prepared to meet him at the same place. Unlike the other relationships of his past, with Young-so, Go Yeong had reached a point of emotional maturity where he was willing to invest, to open up and to fully commit. He saw in Young-so the potential for something lasting, something real. But did not get the love he needed in return.

Gyu-ho: His true first love ♡ the one who he genuinely loved and who wholeheartedly loved him in return. There was no pretense in this, Gyu-ho was the love that Go Yeong needed, someone who truly saw him, accepted him and loved him for who he was. I think Yeong found a security that had been missing in his other relationships. It was a love built on understanding and care. He is the one who made him feel safe, seen, and wanted in a way no one else had. He was the anchor Go Yeong needed, the one who grounded him in a world that often felt unstable.

Gyu-ho was that person, the one who embodied everything Go Yeong had been searching for and at last found.

His only Wish.

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On that note, can we just take a moment to appreciate the incredible talent of the actors in this show? they are absolute STARS and they completely brought these characters to life in a way that left me SHOOK! Go Yeong is portrayed so sensible and I am just in awe of how the actor brought all those emotions out. You can literally see the struggles in his eyes, he perfectly shows us the heartache and longing that makes you root for him.

One last thing: as someone who has read the novel, I can confidently say they absolutely nailed it with this adaptation! they managed to keep the essence of the story intact while adding just the right amount of creativity to the characters and their struggles. You can tell the creators really understood the source material and respected the things that make it so impactful.

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