Intimate Relationships Are A Spectrum

Japanese BL writers are often fantastic at portraying life situations in a raw and realistically human way. As humans we are complicated and emotionally messy. We have dark sides and traumas that shape how we pursue romantic relationships and affection. In my opinion, rarely do we see media portrayal of a BDSM relationship in such an intimate and relatable way.

We’re introduced to Mizuki and Yoh’s relationship from Yoh’s perspective. From the beginning, according to Yoh, we believe Mizuki is quiet, domineering and unkind to Yoh completely unprovoked and without context. As the viewer, we’re led to think Yoh is a domestic sexual slave in Mizuki’s home with no other options in life, outside of his own free will. As we continue the series, we learn that Yoh seems to like the dynamic of thier relationship and often resorts to pouting and childish behavior when Mizuki doesn’t show him the kind of dominating attention he craves. He often provokes Mizuki’s jealously and possessiveness so he can be the “victim” of Mizuki’s gentle yet “cruel” behavior. Mizuki seems to understand this dark side of Yoh and he happily grants Yoh’s wishes. Even cooking and caring for him when Yoh loses his job and falls into a state of depression.

While reeling at the loss of his job and his status in life, Yoh takes his provocation of Mizuki too far. On an animalistic and subconscious level, Yoh is provoking Mizuki to find out how much he cares for him. As a result, Mizuki’s jealously rages and he resorts to stalking and possessive behaviors, to bring Yoh back to his side, even though Yoh never considers leaving him. Since the two never clearly communicate thier feelings or emotions, they often run with negative and exaggerated interpretations of benign day-to-day situations. When Mizuki finally reveals his true feelings and tells Yoh he cannot breath without him, Yoh revels in this revelation but still doesn’t verbally reciprocate his feelings to Mizuki.

I personally love the push and pull by Yoh and Mizuki in this series. Yoh and Mizuki have a codependent relationship that makes them both happy and anxious, simultaneously. They know how to press each other’s buttons and it all seems to be, at least from Yoh’s side, for the sake of sexual gratification and arousal. Are they communicating in a healthy way, no, is the relationship kind of toxic, yes, but is it a realistic slice of life, absolutely. It’s obvious that they love and care for one another, but they show it in a way that differs from what society deems as “normal”. BUT they also require what we all want in a long term relationship, reassurance and stability. After 4 months living together, I believe we, the viewer, are meeting them at a pivotal moment in thier relationship. Will they give each other the emotional and verbal reassurance they need to sustain a long term relationship or will thier relationship crumble under misunderstandings due to lack of emotional transparency.

Lees verder