My In-depth Analysis of My Beautiful Man

I was reading through a lot of these reviews and thought I'd add my two cents.

As someone who has already rewatched this series a gazillion times since it first came out, I'm probably gonna be a bit biased.

I have seen many mixed reviews on this drama, with many saying its perfect and amazing, and others claiming it to be the worst drama ever.
I can understand where many are going with their opinions, but as story analysis is basically my life at this point, I thought I'd try and clear a few things.

Many people who see this drama as terrible and the worst thing they'd ever seen, seem to have a trend with their opinions. Its always, "Hira's an obsessive loser who is bullied by Kiyoi, and Kiyoi is this prideful asshole who bosses Hira around." While I get where they're coming from, it seems they have only taken this drama at face value.

It takes a while for one to understand the certain complexities of these characters. I wont say they're stupid, cause thats not right either, but understanding where each of these characters is coming from takes a lot more thought and deliberation.

Hira's character is one of my favorites, mostly because of how he sees the world. There are many insecurities woven into Hira's character that not many dramas, bl or not, try to portray. While many see Hira's character as a helpless loser, its more because he's "different". Which i unfortunately relate to a lot more than i should. Hira has a hard time expressing himself, its literally one of the first things explained in the series. Also, while Hira seems like a push over who lets people walk all over him, its explained in the novel (not as much in the series ig) that Hira lets people tell him what to do because he'd rather not deal with the issues that would come from him refusing and standing up for himself. This is also why i believe that hira never really cared for doing errands for Kiyoi, because he was used to being ordered around by other people. Sad, but true for a lot of people. Now, to address Hira's obsessive behavior. Its bad, but i will admit, he's a lot more tame than many other obsessive characters in dramas. I've seen both A Round Trip to Love and the Effect series. I know what obsessive is. Hira's obsession is more of a one sided idolization of Kiyoi. This is expressed multiple times in how Hira sees Kiyoi as a "god" and how he's "untouchable". Hira never sees Kiyoi as an object that belongs to him, like many obsessive characters. Once again, ARTTL has scarred me. Now, i get how you might say "Hira's just obsessed with Kiyoi as a person, not that he wants to own him." And yes, that's true, but its similar to the way a teenager is obsessed with their favorite celebrity, which is normal, yet in some cases odd. To adress the machine gun scenes, those are metaphorical. I saw many a comment on how its insane of him to want to shoot his classmates. Let's get this straight. Hira never wanted to actually kill his classmates. It's a metaphorical feeling of wanting them "dead" not in a way of killing them, but wanting them to stop or to just disappear. Now the matter of Hira and the photos of Kiyoi. I saw someone say it was weird for hira to tuck in Kiyoi's picture with him in the bed, but, honestly, thats not that bad. And while Hira masturbating to Kiyoi's photo was weird, its not that uncommon. People fantasize about their idols/celebrities in unsavory situations all the time, and be it weird, you cant just get on him for it.

I'd like to also include my take on Koyama and his relationship with Hira. I've seen many people talk about poor Koyama and how could Hira choose Kiyoi over him. I can understand as Koyama was a true friend to Hira, but i dont think many people are getting the point. There's a few reasons Hira chose Kiyoi over Koyama. Main one being that Hira never thought of Koyama as anything more than a close friend. Even though Hira and Koyama were friends for a few years, Hira still had a crush on Kiyoi the entire time. While i think that Koyama does deserve to be happy with someone, i dont think that person could ever be Hira. Even if they did get together, it would be one-sided on Koyama's end and would only hurt both of them in the long run. Ive heard some rebuttals of "Well, Hira would just learn to love Koyama and realize how much he does for him." That's not how Hira works. Hira has a hard time "liking" things to begin with. I'm pretty sure Hira understands how much Koyama does for him, and appreciates it dearly, but never thought of it as anything more than helping out a friend, in the same way of how Hira took care of him when he was sick. Also, Hira's love for Kiyoi is probably a "once-in-a-lifetime" deal. Kiyoi was the first person that Hira had ever truly "liked". It is implied that Hira feels this way ever since he first sees Kiyoi, so if Hira has known Koyama for a few years and hasnt felt anything, i doubt those feelings would change, especially since Hira has very complicated emotions.

I'm going to get a bit opinionated with this part, so if you are a big Koyama supporter, i recommend skipping this bit. I think that Koyama is just as selfish as the rest of the characters. He claims to love and cherish Hira more than Kiyoi ever could, but fails to take Hira's feelings into account. (I will admit that he's a bit more tame in s2 but the salt is still vefy much so present.) Koyama repeatedly asked Hira how and why he could like someone like Kiyoi and tells him how terrible Kiyoi is. Hira tries to tell him that he doesn't know Kiyoi like he does. (True with a capital T) I wont get mad at Koyama for the first impression he gets of Kiyoi, since its understandable that he sees him as rude and mean based of of their interaction. And while i can see how Koyama telling Hira that Kiyoi is not a good person is just concern from a friend, what gets me is the fact that Koyama has the hardest time accepting that Hira likes Kiyoi instead of him. The fact that he asks why Hira couldn't give him a chance is proof enough to me. When someone is madly in love with someone else, they're not just gonna stop loving them just because you tell them too, especially with someone like Hira. As much as i love Koyama's actor, i don't think he's as good of a person like everyone chalks him up to be.

Onto Kiyoi. Get ready for a roller coaster. There were many comments talking about how Kiyoi is such a bully and how his past doesn't excuse him for his current actions. Kiyoi is what i like to call, the most perfect tsundere character to ever be created. The reason his character is perceived as the popular bully is based off of a one sided view point. (Considering many of the people who called him an asshole and a bully dropped the series after only 2-3 eps says something bout yall.) Up front, yes, kiyoi is rude, mean, a bully. But it takes a bit of analysis and dissection of his character to really understand him. I will say it outright, Kiyoi bullied Hira the least out of that entire friend group. (Maybe second least if you count Kurata.) Yes, he did bully Hira in the beginning by ordering him around, but he never directed bullied him. (Ill get to Kiyoi's "disgusting." comments later) If you didn't notice, Kiyoi never called Hira, HiHi or Stutz, (the nickname changes based on the translations) like the rest of the group did. Kiyoi also never really let Hira get pushed around by anyone other than himself. And even when he ordered Hira to buy them things, Kiyoi always paid him back. This is implied when Hira talks about the flask of coins from the change Kiyoi would give him. Also, in the novel, when Shirota gets mad at Hira for getting the wrong sandwich, Hira brings up how Shirota hadn't been paying him for the food. The reason most likely being that Kiyoi wasnt paying him since Kiyoi wasn't top dog of the group anymore and the job of paying went to Shirota. (This might be a bad interpretation cause i want able to finish reading since the translation wasnt finished) Anyways, this same scene is also where Kiyoi tells Hira to not go back and buy a new sandwich cause he needs to eat too, further proving how Kiyoi didnt let Hira get pushed around by anyone else. I get how you might think Kiyoi pushing him around and not letting others push Hira around is still bad, but it would be a lot worse if Kiyoi just let those things happen. Now, i saw a comment on how it was wrong for Kiyoi to get physically violent with Hira. I'm guessing they're talking about the bench scene after the cafe when Kiyoi lost the competition. There is a perfectly logical explanation for this. At that time, Hira basically trapped Kiyoi in his arms, told him he liked him, and wouldn't stop when Kiyoi told him to let go. I dont know about you, but I'd sure as hell fight tooth and nail to get away, even if the person was someone i knew. Finally, im going to adress Kiyoi calling Hira "gross", "weird", and "disgusting". As i mentioned at the beginning, Kiyoi is a tsundere character who has a hard time expressing his true emotions. So when he calls Hira these names, hes not insulting him. Its the same as someone calling a friend or parter "stupid" or "dumb" when they do something silly. Its not meant to be an insult, just something they say as a light-hearted tease. Adressing the "stalker" situation, while Hira following Kiyoi to the dance studio can be seen as stalker-ish behavior, it only happens once, and the only other time that you could kind of count him stalking is when Hira follows Kiyoi behind the school, but its obvious that Kiyoi intended for Hira to follow him. There is also Kiyoi's jealous behavior, which even I cant deny is toxic. Kiyoi does tend to lose his temper with Hira when hes mad at something he did.

I personally dont have a direct opinion on their relationship, because i believe that no relationship is perfect and that if people truly love each other they can overcome differences and change for the better. I will never deny the fact that Kiyoi and Hira's relationship is toxic, especially with the amount of jealousy and miscommunication woven through their storyline, but that doesn't exactly mean that they arent good for each other. Both are toxic in their own ways and, oddly enough, that kinda makes them perfect for each other. I will, however, address the king/sevant dynamic. Many of the negative comments would talk about how this show glorifies a master/servant relationship (which is a very toxic dynamic), but they never really glorify this dynamic and actually express how Hira's mindset of Kiyoi being a king and how Hira is just his lowly servant has hurt them and prevented them from being true to their feelings. Kiyoi even says in the last episode, "I'm not a king, okay?" and refuses to be with Hira as long as he still sees him as an untouchable god. In my opinion, they do the exact opposite of glorifying the master/servant dynamic. Remember, people, just because a thing is a major plot point in a show doesn't mean it glorifies it.

To end it off, because i realize this is going on longer than i expected, i will say that the story itself isnt perfect, but this is largely in part by the fact that the series is only 6 episodes long and doesn't have that long of a run time anyways. Even though i haven't been able to find a full english translation for the novel, of what i have read, it does go a bit more into detail compared to the series. All in all, this is one of my favorite series, mostly because of my love for Yusei Yagi, but i do think it provides a different and unique take on the regular school dramas.

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