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It's Okay to Not Be Okay korean drama review
Voltooid
It's Okay to Not Be Okay
297 mensen vonden deze beoordeling nuttig
by eolsseo13
aug 22, 2020
16 van 16
Voltooid 29
Geheel 6.0
Verhaal 4.0
Acting/Cast 8.5
Muziek 9.0
Rewatch Waarde 1.0
Deze recentie kan spoilers bevatten

A lacking story with a pretty package

**CONTAINS SPOILERS**

**The GOOD:**

1) Aesthetics: the FLs costume, cinematography and animations are really eye-catching. However, it must be said that the animation style and aesthetics style they went with is very derivative, clearly taking inspiration from the works of Tim Burton (and his team) as well as Tadahiro Uesugi and Neil Gaiman (Coraline). Anyways, bravo for the art direction department.

2) Representation of people in the autism spectrum: although seen in Western movies and series, it seems that in Kdrama-land the depiction of people in the spectrum is overall lacking. Oh Jung Se also does a great job in this role, picking up on the small details without coming off as a caricature.

3) Acting of leads and chemistry between the main couple: Oh Jung Se and Seo Ye Ji showed that they're great actors. Kim Soohyun was good too, but I wouldn't say he was particularly remarkable. However, he and YeJi did a good job building the chemistry between the main couple. Also, on a superficial level, they just look good together, period.


**The BAD:**

**lots of spoilers ahead**

1) ASPD being used as lure without proper development and approach: the drama original title (Psycho, but it's okay) is sensationalist enough -- and one might say even offensive to those who suffer with ASPD -- but it could be given leeway if they were to subvert the stigma carried by people diagnosed with ASPD. However, besides one single mention by a secondary character, the show never expands on the FL alleged diagnosis. Her toxic behaviour in the beginning of the series were even excused by some viewers on the ground that she has a personality disorder. Unfortunately, in the end, we learn that the FL was just a person that had traumas and developed (toxic/unhealthy) coping mechanisms. So basically the show used ASPD as an "exotic" character trait to get viewers interested on the show and then didn't raise any awareness about it. It was a mere plot device.

2) The trope of the toxic male lead but with genders reversed: we all know that many kdramas are guilty of having a jerk ML that constantly mistreats or looks down upon the "doormat" FL only for him to be redeemed and the couple finally get together. Usually, in order to redeem the ML we learn that he actually had a terrible childhood, even though he was rich, his parents were abusive or just absent etc etc. We all know that. What this drama does is the exactly the same thing, except that the toxic part of the couple is initially the FL.

A lot of people considered her rudeness, aggressiveness and manipulative behaviour as "badass" and others excused her because of her supposed ASPD. Well, even if she did have a personality disorder that absolutely doesn't excuse behaviours like sexually harassing the ML, using his disabled brother to lure him to her house, among other gratuitious mean behaviours she had initially.

The whole idea that one should endure boundary-pushing, threats, and manipulation until stockholm syndrome kicks in and they finally heal their stalker who loves and obsesses over them is just an outdated and tired troped that should be dropped by writers at this point.

On a side-ish note, I guess it has also become a trend in kdramas to have a FL with alleged "sociopathic tendencies" as seen recently on Itaewon Class for example. Seems like writers are overcompensating years of male toxicity by writing toxic females, which is not the point of feminism at all. And seeing people lowkey (or highkey) glorifying that behaviour is kinda disappointing too.

3) The trope of the destined connection: aka "we actually knew each other as kids but can't remember that for some alien reason!". Do I need to say anything more about it? I guess it's consensus by now that we're done with such trope. And it was barely needed in this drama too.

4) The trope of the forced cohabitation: again, not only this is tired but it was also connected with the FL toxic behaviour as explained above.

5) The gigantic plot hole: welp, the whole way they dealt with the FL mom was a mess and a half. It was textbook *deus ex machina* plot device. The implausible survival and comeback of the mother serves as a way to bring "resolution" and a happy ending to the characters.
One could disregard this argument and say this series is inspired by fairy tales and it was borderline within the magical realism genre. First of all, I think it's a strech to call it a magical realism work of fiction. But even if it was, every work of fiction regardless of genre should have generic verisimilitude (https://www.masterclass.com/articles/what-is-verisimilitude#what-are-the-types-of-verisimilitude-in-fiction), even fairy tales. No matter how outlandish the premises of the work are, it should carry internal consistency. In the world/universe established in IONTBO the mother plot still doesn't make any sense, nowhere it's hinted that magical plastic surgery exists etc. It's just poor writing, let's admit that.

6) The trope of 'love heals all': people who loved this drama will say the characters improved on their own and weren't really codependent. But weren't they really?

The haircut moment -- usually used as an example of MY independently healing -- is more a symbolic and cathartic moment but it by no means is proper treatment or would accomplish major strides by itself. The show didn't give treatment of mental illness any layers of complexity. Not once she had to sit through therapy sessions, take medication, and her progress was pretty linear when in reality we have ups and downs. Another issue I take with her development is that she barely builds any relationships outside of the one with the brothers.

KT could also have gone through therapy to learn some healthy coping mechanism and how to assume his role as a caretaker in a less burdensome way.

What we saw on the show was that the leads healed as their relationship developed/romantically progressed, it was an intertwined process. The overall message conveyed is that they could ultimately heal because they were each other "safety pins" and that's neither healing on your own nor how it works irl.

So yeah, the show did not approach healing of trauma in a groundbreaking way, they went with the "love heals wounds" path.


**The "what isn't really my cup of tea but isn't objectively a flaw" aka personal side notes one shouldn't take as criticism**

1) The drama is really slow-paced, nothing much happens in its first half and barely on the second. But hey, some people prefer slow-burning stories and character study dramas. So there's that.

2) Having not read much about this show before watching, a friend told me this would focus on mental illness, so I build the expectation of it tackling this social issue in the way Sky Castle did with the Korean school system. But the show actually is just a romcom/melodrama that is set up in a mental institution. The main focus is the romance and not a commentary on the Korean mental health system.
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