Give this gem a chance, it's really quite phenomenal!

I never write reviews, but I HAD to for this one. This entire drama is a RIDE. It put me through so many emotions, each episode bringing on a new perspective or insight.

First thing, there are some *hella* spoilers about FL's and ML's characteristics below the next paragraph. Second, I *highly* recommend this drama to anyone who enjoys a lowkey but somehow also intense psychological mind fck. Third, KEEP watching. Power through that initial uncomfortableness you may feel after hearing FL's past. Fourth, it's pretty subtle in how it does it, but this entire series is explaining the effects of s*xual ab*se, so if you're triggered by that, find something else. Lastly, only the right audience will understand it's full value. At face value it seems straight forward with cliche MCs (an annoying FL pushover who gets used by the aloof, cold ML etc.), so honestly, a lot of people will or have given it a bad rating. As I mentioned, it's complex in an almost subtle psychological way and definitely not for everyone and there's no shame in that.

Dramas get a lot of crap for being stupidly dense sometimes, but this one takes it to a whole other level in a BRILLIANT way. The undertones of misunderstanding and miscommunication in this bsh is just *chef's kiss*. And somehow, it's really not a frustrating "just tell them and sort it out already!" sort of thing either. It's more of a, gosh darn, THAT's why you're like this--this makes SO much sense. It leads you to think one thing, and the next thing you know, your entire perspective has changed on it. It's just so *real*. It's maturity, mental health, s*xuality, ignorance, consequences, psychological healing, and all sort of adulty things wrapped up in a wonderful, ever-evolving-beautifully bow. Even the supporting characters are well done and not annoyingly evil or as manipulative as they usually are (although, I'd have liked to see a story to the female roommate since everyone else had a story that helped to really explain their characters). Also, go in with the understanding that the ML is most-likely neuro-divergent despite it not saying so. (Forewarning, he's almost too gosh darn attractive that dude.)


ML & FL characteristic and past SPOILERS & EXPLANATIONS (since there's no way to explain why I love it without describing certain important aspects... it's also gonna be longgg):

I'm pretty sure the entire theme of this show is that how we see things and think about things will ultimately dictate the future. And it's amazing how subtle they made this, despite proof of it being there in every episode practically. Also, as I said it's a big shoutout to s*xual abuse awareness and the mental effect it has on its victims. Huge bravo to that one; showing how even if the victim doesn't understand fully, it still leaves a lasting impression. That, again, is a silent yet constant theme in the series.

FL had an experience akin to someone who was s*xually abused (by ML). It changed her. After that experience, she felt the shame and embarrassment that is typically seen in SA cases. So, with this new mindset, she believed ML looked down on her afterwards etc. and continued to go through life with this mindset, hence setting her up for failure in love and life and most importantly, selflove.

However, eventually it shows us the ML POV and we see that the FL's way of thinking and 'truth' is different from his. He didn't look down at her at all, he lowkey worshipped her and felt unworthy of being with her. In his own weird way, he also had a traumatic experience. I highly doubt he understood the extent to how wrong he was (seems like there's sometimes a lot of cluelessness from characters about s*xual abuse in k, c and j dramas) but I think he understood that he did something not completely right to her (he showed this by confessing he wanted to apologize but also felt conflicted because he didn't want to say he regretted being with her). I think this is why he's always like... quadruple checking with her to make sure it's okay he's doing this and that. Honestly, this self-consciousness of his is probably why he was having issues in the first place: he didn't want to repeat the experience since he, as well, felt abandoned afterwards. But I get the feeling he still doesn't understand why he feels this way (it's more of a subconscious thing that's shown in his actions). Add on to the possibility he might be neuro divergent, it makes him all the more confused and quiet about it.

Overview of how this drama made me feel:
(1st) I was amused at the ML being FL's roommate and rooting for a blossoming love between them. And the sexual chemistry was off the charts. ML is so hot, stop.
(2) I felt betrayed!!! I was SO angry at ML after hearing FL side of the story and watching her being used so blatantly (I almost checked out, I was so uncomfortable... but, trust me, keep watching!).
(3) I was frustrated with FL for wanting to be with ML despite such a traumatic past with him, as well as frustrated at how she was so easily letting herself be used.
(4) I put myself in FL's shoes and realized that it's a normal thing SA victims go through--wanting acceptance and love from their abusers and those around them. She had experienced abandonment in her head after the SA and it made her feel like she was worthless and useless. Thus, being used was a good thing in her eyes--it meant she was useful instead.
(5) I realized (quite sourly) that FL's experience wasn't the ML's... his story was different, more innocent, and about his own self-consciousness of feeling like he wasn't worthy of her. Meaning, they both lived in their own head and never thought to check in on one another about how they were feeling. They both thought something self-deprecating and, as I said, it set them up for failure.
(6) It ended weirdly but I still felt like there was enough closure. Overall, it wrapped up really well psychologically (ending spoilers on their characters below):

- ML needed to be more considerate of FL and think about how she may feel in situations rather than always think that he was unworthy of her and think about his own feelings. He will probably always have issues talking about and understanding such things like feelings, but if the ending tells us anything it's that he won't just do what he thinks he should based on his own feelings, and instead consider what FL is going through and adjust based on that.
- FL needed to stop assuming how others felt about her and making that assumption become her personality/self-identity. She needed to stop portraying her insecurities and assumptions on the ML and instead trust herself--self love, baby. And again, because ML probably will never truly tell her his feelings, she will still go through insecurities, but she will just have to trust herself (and him) that much harder. With him also adjusting his actions to her, this should make it easier to do as they continue to grow.

Idk if it's a good or bad thing they aren't split up, but I do think they will continue to grow and heal with or without one another.

Moral of the show from MY perspective: when you have s*x, make sure there's explicit consent (!!!!!!) and make sure to check up on one another after (aftercare is important for all parties involved). Also, just because you feel a certain way about something or someone, doesn't mean it's really that way. There's so many other perspectives than just yours, so just ask! Think positively! Oh, and it's never too early to teach your kids safe sex and how to properly get consent... because who knows when they'll be in a situation needing it. In this situation, it hurt not just the victim, but also the one doing it unknowingly.

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