Mixed emotions, waring between disappointment and thankfulness towards the actors.

First, many almost or totally negative opinions, I do agree on many of them.

I can's say that this drama was good. In many aspects, it was truly disappointing and I was tempted to leave it be in various episodes...
One of the worst comments in my head at one point was, how it reminds me of the 'Bold and the Beautiful, from when I was a child and my sister watched it from day to day. Thankfully this feeling wasn't constant and only came to me at the end of the drama.

I will write all the bad feelings and then I will add some light to why I finished it. All of the following is not in sequence of my feelings during watching the drama, just what my emotions are out right now.

First the national pride. Though I understand where they come from, why it was brought out, especially within the political mud throwing, pandemic, etc, we are facing these days, it was so overused that from some point I just fast-forwarded from those dialogues, talks and tried to see where the important stuff comes. It might be impressive and important that Chinese scientists are getting shadowed by Europeans or Americans, but all in all, from a common person's view, scientists as a person or one of the team of scientists, should be concentrating on their vision and work as scientists and not depend on country whom he/her belongs to. If you discover something, work on it, prove it(or however it's called) then yes, integrity is important, so don't sell it to the highest bidder, be proactive and publish it, don't concentrate on who might invent, discover something before you.

(In a way the same goes for writing books, I should stop writing because there are probably hundreds or thousands of writers who think of the same subject, think of the same theories and so on, what's the point in writing my story then... So this storyline really affected my mood and didn't suit my logic in life.)

So to the integrity of people... It's shown as non-existent or so overboard important that you would do anything to protect it. I will kill myself to protect the secret of a formula, to protect another life, to take revenge on someone. I think anyone would have thought of a few or many versions of how some of these huge stupid plot holes would have been better written.

Honestly, I think it's about 16-20ep long if taken the real, important, truly well played-written dramatic content. Not 42episodes. One of the reasons I watched it until the end... I really wanted to see how they play it out... most of it just disappointed me. I can't really tell what they wanted to show with this drama. Was it the science, Chinese integrity, sacrifice, sick twisted minds, self-degrading love... I could go on...

As a woman, I could take a plot with a strong female lead storyline and understand it, accept it and maybe even like it. Though they are hardly ever written and played out in a way I think they are commending to women... rather they try to say that women are good and acceptable, respected only when they sit in the same place where men do...
I think as a woman we should be able to do anything we want, is it the scientist, company CEO, cook or a mother, a knitter... all these should be given the same equal value... Vise versa, I think the same about men. They also should be able to do stuff they want even when we think they are stronger, and let's be honest a man lifting a 40kg box seems more natural than a woman doing it, but there are maybe women who want to do even that, not being forced to do it. But there might be men who want to cook, clean homes, knit, take care of kids, be a corporation CEO, scientist... Oh, I'm being too emotional...
So, I think these normal working women, in struggling positions, having kids, being degraded, given value based on what they do, having to get married before 30, etc... are just wrongly shown in storylines and these dramas do not give women rights, but rather popularize some of these old and demeaning traditions and twist the understanding of the possibility of being equal with men.

Side characters. I think there isn't much improvement in the plot, storyline's of the side characters, the amount of gossip, backstabbing, obsessive love, which has nothing to do with love at all, was again so overstretched, so though I commend the actors for their work, and I truly do. Then they had so much empty or pointless work, I just sincerely hope that someone, some director, or a writer or a producer is able to see in this drama, the acting stability and effort and talent they showed. Most of the actors I truly liked and think though I don't like the drama, I would watch other dramas with them.

Now let's give a little credit, so I'll end this on a lighter note. Almost.

Main leads, storyline, acting and actors themselves:
First, I can't get away from the fact that the love line was truly toxic. I would keep away from this kind of character if I ever meet him/her in real life. She has so much integrity and self-right that it's overflowing, not giving in, and only a small amount of forgiveness and acceptance for another person. I can't imagine being together with this kind of judgmental partner even if I was the most perfect person in the world. So I liked the female lead only about 35%

Male lead. I think there is this kind of broken person in some way, inside a lot of people. Maybe not so grotesque, and so broken, but as a therapist, one sees them, whether they show it or not, through therapy they are seen. Helping them heal, work through their misery and problems is possible only if they themselves are able to admit the brokenness and ask for help for real. So, I could relate to this broken character. His decisions in this drama, are still way beyond what I think a person should make... If anyone really leads this kind of life, my deepest sympathy, it's a harsh life then. There is unreal brokenness in people, in various places of the world, within various unreasonable situations, but emotional distress, hurting inner mind, still feels like the greatest torture for me. So, I did feel for him a lot. I think though I don't like the plot development, this character is the most well written in this drama and I lived through his emotions the most.

The storyline was so over the top, as complicated as could be, so the actors seemed to have been told to go through various and as many possible emotions, situations, character developments as the scriptwriter could possibly fit into one drama. Which took most of the interest out of watching. From one moment person's brain can't handle the emotional carousel and you just feel numb and want the drama to end.

Now the most admirable thing about this drama are these actors. Yes, I don't like Victoria. For years already, as I don't like many female singers, but that's my personal opinion. Never said she is a bad person or sings badly. Still, I do say, even though the plot ruined her character for me, she played her emotions pretty well. I even discovered crying once during her emotional scene and thought that she was pretty raw in her emotions and did all too well in the script she was given. I even hated her for a moment or two because she was so true to the character she played.

Leo Luo... He is the only reason I finished the drama at all. His acting skills impressed me in Ashes of Love and I liked him in Love is Sweet. But I didn't expect him to show such a class. I can say that I would like to see him in a truly well written, hurting, distraught character again, without this kind of a plot... I would feel like I did now, without at the same time hating the script. I think he is an amazing actor and I will really soon watch his other dramas, hoping to find a better feel and a better partner for him on screen in acting and character-wise.

All in all. I don't recommend this drama.
If there is someone, someday who would put up in YT or some other place, an edited version of this drama, including only scenes that are worthwhile, I will watch it and recommend it... Watching 42 episodes of this drama is not worth your while if you are not a die-hard fan of one of these actors.

My very personal, and emotional opinion(can't even call it a review anymore.) of this drama.

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